What I’m excited about this Week!

What I’m excited about this Week!

  1. My first hummingbird of the season!

I wish we could attach tiny cameras to these guys. They astound me with their toughness. Hummers migrate as much as 500 miles, and can weigh less than a penny!

 

 

 

2. The crocuses are up!

We had such a mellow winter that I don't really need any spring promises, but I sure love seeing their multi-colored petals pop from the barren soil when everything around them i s still waiting for more warmth!

 

 

  1. The Vultures are back!

 

People see these beauties as ugly and dirty. When in fact they are the great cleaners of our woods. They keep smelly, rotting corpses from pervading a walk in the woods.

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. I have high cortisol levels. These videos from Dr. John Gray of Mars/Venus fame, have provided me some insight and hope that I will be able to find some internal calm.

5. And read about our adventure flying to Florida! We got a ride in a police car!

Have a great week!

 

I want to tell you a story. A story of the good people of this country

I want to tell you a story. A story of the good people of this country

I want to tell you a story. A story of the good people of this country. How different beliefs and ways of life don’t need to be an excuse not to be kind and compassionate towards fellow humans.

My husband and I flew our Mooney airplane to Greenville Alabama a couple of weeks ago, on our way to Florida. We were pushing to get past a storm build up in the midwest. We didn’t think much of what we’d do once we got there.

 

At 8pm we landed in a darkened airport on the outskirts of a small cluster of street lights. There was no lights except one small one near the fuel pumps. As far as we could see was darkness.  As Jim unloaded our overnight bags from the plane, I called some local hotels to make sure we had a bed to sleep in. That accomplished we tied down the plane assured we wouldn’t be sleeping under the wings for the night.

I searched on google for a taxi to take us to the hotel, and I was astonished to not find one. I called back to the hotel that my intuition indicated would be the best place to stay and asked the front desk clerk if she could recommend a taxi service.

She returned, “Ma’m we don’t have any taxi service here. ”

What? No taxis? I had lived in a town of 14,000 people and there were taxis. It never occurred to me that we would arrive someplace and not have a way of getting to a hotel.

“Oh well,” I replied, ” do you have any suggestions on how we can get from the airport to your hotel?”

“The police can pick you up.” She stated matter-of-factly.

“What? The police?” I briefly wondered if we had done something wrong and were now going to spend the night in the local jail.

“Yeah, they give people rides. Call me back in five minutes and I’ll give them a call.”

Jim and I finished preparing the plane for the night, and joked about the possibility of being picked up by the local police. In five minutes I called Tammy back.

“The police are on their way.” Tammy said.

I still couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“Wow, thank you! I’m so appreciative of all your help!”

“It’s no problem, see you in a bit.”

And a few minutes later Jim and I were standing outside the Greenville airport gate, wondering what was going to happen when the police arrived.

One lone car headed our way. It was a big, black and white Ford Explorer with POLICE neatly lettered on the side.

A fully armed police officer stepped out of the car. “I hear you need a ride to the Comfort Inn.”

Jim and I were still confounded by the situation. “Yes, if you have the time, we would appreciate it.”

“No problem at all, hop in.”

He opened the back doors to his SUV, cleared out the back seat, and in we got.

The friendly man told us all about  Greenville. Population 14,000, major employer is Hyundai. The hotels in the area fill up almost every night as they were on I 65, a corridor through Alabama, that lots of people traveled. Crime was low there.

Ten minutes later he dropped us off at the Comfort Inn.  While others were getting out of their vehicles, we were getting out our bags from the back of a Police car. I wondered what people thought?

We walked in the through the sliding glass doors, and there sat this angel of a woman, Tammy, checking in another couple at the front desk.

“Hi! You must be the folks from the airport.”

“Yes!  Thank you so much for arranging a ride for us.”

“No problem. I used to work down there, so I just called them up. It’s a quiet night. I’ll be with you in a minute.”

And let me tell you, Tammy didn’t take off her angel wings once we had arrived to the hotel. She also got us some really good BBQ from Fireman’s BBQ. They had been closed for a half hour, but they gladly made us some food to go. And the food was delicious! Tammy even loaned us her car so we could drive there!  Who does that these days?

Tammy, and all the people like her.

That’s what makes this world go around. People like her is what makes the world a place I want to live. It reminds us we are all human.

I don’t know Tammy’s political beliefs, or environmental stance. She didn’t care what ours was either. We were fellow humans in need of assistance that night, and that’s all she saw. And that’s all the people of the great town of Greenville Alabama saw too.

And they made me a better person for it.

 

 

To Retire or Not Retire, What’s REALLY the question?

To retire or not to retire, or What kind of experience in life do you want to have?

Now a days everyone has this expectation that we are going to retire. We plan for it, we look forward to it, and we depend on our employer to contribute towards the inevible day when we will no longer have to get up at the crack of dawn, and start another day, much like the day before.

 

But is retirement for everyone?

How did all this begin anyway?

The first concept of retirement began in Prussia in 1881 as a way of clearing out the workforce of older people to make room for the unemployed youth.

Retirement age was set at 70 and then they would receive government support. And life expectancy then was also 70. So I’m not sure how much that plan helped!

Pensions for certain municipal employees, firefighters, cops, teachers and the military started in the mid-1800’s in the U.S. By the 1920’s private companies such as railroads and banks were offering some retirement support also.

When the Social Security Act was passed in 1935 the retirement age was 65, but the life expectancy of men, which was the majority of the workforce was 58.

Now because life expectancy is much older people can be retired for decades.

But are those people happier and healthier?

Research shows overwhelmingly that those who continue to work are healthier and have fewer physical problems.

But there was no indication if those that were continuing to work were working because they wanted to or they had to.

What is it we really want? Is retiring just a way to stop doing a job you don’t like? Do we really want to  work at nothing at all? Or is what we really want is to not HAVE to work?

There are lots of millionaires who can stop working but they don’t. One friend made 100 million dollars when he was in his early 40’s. And he still invents new things. He likes having some sort of structure to his life. Otherwise he feels like there is no point. Playing only is fun when there is a counterbalance of work.

I have several friends who became financially independent in their 50s and they continue to work, just fewer hours.

Charles spoke to us of his tactic of taking on different jobs and having great experiences along the way.  But it also has left him having to work in his 70s. When I asked him if he had any regrets doing it that way, he said No he was happy with his decision.

I have good friends that stopped working a regular job when their daughter turned 16. They home-schooled her and traveled the country in a converted bus. They funded their life by making books for people, long before it became so easy to make your own books. They are 70 now and they believe they did it right. They have gotten to live in a banana plantation in Maui for a year, on a beach in WA and spent summers in Ireland. They can’t stop working completely, but they would still be doing what they are doing if they could.  They said a lot of their friends who worked regular jobs their whole lives are not any better financial shape as them, and my friends are much healthier.

In my research the people who were looking forward to retirement were the ones who didn’t like their jobs, or had the ‘golden handcuffs.’

When I worked at LANL the place was full of people just putting in their time until they reached the 30yr mark so they could retire. The non-scientists had been miserable for 15 or more years but the pension promise was so good they felt compelled to stay. (And as a side note, the scientists were having so much fun that they kept coming to work even when they weren’t getting a paycheck, until one day death kept them away.

My husband worked for the FAA for a couple of years and wondered how  government efficiency would change if there weren’t well-funded pensions? Would there be more effective people running our government because it wouldn’t be full of people just drifting towards retirement?

As a child I watched my Dad be miserable day in and day out as he went to work. He retired when he was 55, 25 years ago. Now, he spends his days hiking and volunteering, and he isn’t any happier.  The way I see it is he kept blaming his job for his misery, rather than looking within for his unhappiness.

After watching him bumble along, I decided to travel in my twenties, and throughout my life and not wait until I retired to do it. And I have consistently chose happiness over safety.  I kept choosing jobs that challenged me, where I got to learn new things and have new experiences. I don’t know yet if I made the right decision. I don’t have to work a regular job right now but I still work. I have two companies in addition to being a writer and an artist. Work gives me the immediate gratification of contributing and interacting with people. I could have made a lot more money had I stuck to one job and worked up the ranks. And I might have a lot more cushion for my later years, if I make it there. I’m just not willing to roll the dice that I will be able to do all I desire once I turn 65 or some other arbitrary age that society dictates is the time for me to stop working.

It was a choice I made. I have moments when I wished I had saved more. But that is when I am looking into and fearing the future. When I am in the present, when I look at my life now, I am really happy with my choices. The only thing I would change is to BE MORE PRESENT.

I think that’s what we want in addition to financial freedom. We want life to slow down enough for us to be more present. Present to our children, our partner, our friends, and mostly to ourselves. We want to have more time to fully engage with our circle, and not just spin around in it.

Lifestyle is determined by what we value. Are you living a life in line with your values? I was asked this question a couple of years ago and it was really eye opening. Often we think we can’t afford to live by our values. But is this  true?  When I Iisted my values I realized my highest values didn’t cost any money.

So what is the best way to do this retirement thing? I think it is a personal decision, one we have to make for ourselves. And whatever direction we choose, we need to remember that it’s just that, a choice, a series of baby steps taken to reach our goal.

Just make sure you stop and notice the decisions you’re making, how you feel about those decisions when you make them, and if you’re using your choices as an excuse not to enjoy your life now.

 

Sinking

Sinking

Sinking, Sinking, Sinking,
into, the quiet, illustrious flow

Learning to listen,
Learning to go

Under all the noise,
Under all the feign

Under all the tall trees
That cure my pain

The pain that surely comes,
From holding back,

Back from the love,
Back from the crack,

Back from the beauty,
that lies my tracks.

 

 

The only True Fear

The only True Fear

The only real fear is the fear that we can have everything we want.

Did you know this?

I have heard different people say it in various ways, but it was only a week or so ago that I felt it, that the truth of it made my cells feel spritely.

We are told by our parents and society from early on that we ask too much, that we can’t have all we want. That’s what they were told too.

But until we know that we are supported in creating our desires, and we live from this knowing, we will feel in bondage. No amount of money or stuff will ever give us a sense of freedom, until we become okay with this.  The difference between people who have money and are generous and not greedy, and the people who are hyper protective and fear losing what they have, is whether or not they believe they can have more and know there isn’t a limited amount and someone wants to take what they have.

It’s the difference between looking where you’re going, and watching your feet? Would you want a windshield in the floorboard of your car?

If you are scared to look ahead, at your destination, the you probably won’t get there. At least not without a lot of wrong turns.

Have you ever thought “oh it would be nice to have such and such” and then forgot about, only to have it show up the next day?  Or have you thought I would like to have a certain kind of car, and then you start seeing them everywhere?

Pretty cool huh?

It seems scary to allow ourselves to have we want. We think, “then what about the people who don’t already have as much as me? Or if I get all I want, how will that affect others, how will they get what they want?”

But just because one side of the planet has sun for 12 hours, does that mean there isn’t going to be any left for the other side of the planet?

If the west coast gets rain, does that mean there isn’t any left for the east coast?

When we start thinking of it this way then we remember we are not in charge of evening things out. We certainly have no control over what others have, and whether or not they are happy. So what if we just started paying attention to what we want?

If we allow ourselves to have all we want, isn’t it more likely we will be able to give and help others who we are inspired to help?

So what if the crux of every fear we have is the fear of having everything we want? How would knowing that change how you feel today?

 

Connecting the Thoughts

Connecting the Thoughts

Connecting the thoughts

This is how I am striving to live my life right now, intentionally.

Some days look prettier than others.

I think we mostly live our lives unintentionally. They didn’t teach us in grade school the importance of living intentionally. We didn’t have an class on how to create things. That would have been fun though, wouldn’t it?

I think for most of us we can create little things we want. Like thinking of someone and them calling at that time. Or wanting a certain kind of car and then suddenly seeing them everywhere.

But it’s seems harder when there is something we want, really want, and we want it now!

Then we just want the big idea to come, the winning lottery numbers, the inspiration for the next google.

But I think  it’s like learning to ride a bicycle. At first you are unsteady so you go slow. Then as you become more and more comfortable you go faster and faster, you start taking corners faster, maybe even doing jumps. But you have to work up to it.

It would be like driving down a two-lane country road at 45 mph, and then suddenly the car decides to start going 90 mph. For a race car driver, going fast around twisty roads would be nothing because they are use to, they have done it hundreds of times, they are comfortable with that level of speed. But for most of us, it would be scary (not just because the car took over driving!) and it’s more likely we would crash because we hadn’t worked our way up to being comfortable at that speed on a winding road.

But if we had worked up to driving 90 mph on country roads, gone a little faster each time we drove the road? Then it would be fun and exhilarating!

We always think we want to get to the next thing quickly. But what is the possibility that if you knew where the thoughts were taking you, you would go? There are times when we end up in a completely different place than we thought we were going, but we are happy to be there. Would you have wanted to know where you were going? Is it more exciting to go for a road trip and not know what the scenery is going to look like?

We have all heard people say ‘the joy is in the journey.’ And if you’re like me, you want to punch them in the face sometimes. But now I can see the journey is a necessary part of me being able to fully enjoy where I’m going, and not be like so many lottery winners and just loose all I had been given because I didn’t know how to handle it.

As we go towards our destination we get to learn and grow in so many ways. We get to meet new people, and learn new things about ourselves. And I really like that part.

And if the joy isn’t in the journey, then doesn’t life just end up being a bunch of unhappiness, peppered with joy?